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I’m Broken….Please fix me….

January 6, 2009


January 29th 2009 is the 1 year anniversary of my second start at running.  In other words, i’ve been a runner  for the better part of 18 years ON and OFF.  Too much stuff to even talk about right now, but January 29th 2008 I made the decision to love running again.  And i did.  Still do.  

The thing is i keep trying to run as if it was the year 1991.  I keep thinking that i am a young runner able to defy gravity and all the things that sag on my body and still do 8 minute miles.  Ummm nope.  Not happening.  Not even close.  Ok i did run an 8.35 mile a month ago but that was hard and i wasn’t able to maintain that pace.

Right now, i am nursing some sort of odd injury.  Both of my thighs hurt when i run.  They hurt when i walk too.  I cannot seem to figure out if it is my inner thigh or closer to my knees because it seems that sometimes it hurts in either of those two places.  

I am well aware that in less than 3 weeks is the Manhattan Half Marathon.  19 days to be exact.  I am getting anxious and nervous that i may not be able to pull it off.  It’s not that i don’t want to run it because the mind is able.  It’s my damn body that is rebelling against me.  

In 2008 i did all the wrong things.  Everything from running a 36 day running streak to well to lots of things.  I feel as though i did nothing right.  I loved every second of running though.  You all know that about me already.  And i will never give up.  

It’s just that its 6 days into the new year and i only ran 2X.  On the second run, i was told i was limping.  Was I?  I don’t know.  I was running in pain though and i should have known better at this point.  Yet i kept on going.  I cannot get a grip on what i was thinking.  It perplexes me.  

So, here is what i will do.  Take as much time off as needed to have this crazy ass thing heal.  I don’t even have a go to exercise when injured and i can’t run.  Literally, all i do is run.  Thats it.  Not one other exercise has graced my body in a very long time.  Well, unless you count walking as exercise then yes i did cross train.

I will be fine.  I just want to get on with it is all.  I want to run.  I need to run.  I feel crappy when i do not run.  It’s really just that simple.  I guess i am addicted to running.  Why is it that being addicted to something that makes you feel so good can also make you feel so bad when you cannot do it.  Crazy??

So, take a listen to my favorite Coldplay song – Fix You….

I think you may like it.  I know i do!!!

When you try your best but you don’t succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can’t sleep 
Stuck in reverse.

And the tears come streaming down your face 
When you lose something you can’t replace 
When you love someone but it goes to waste 
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home 
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

I’m overwhelmed by the strength of my body and the power of my mind.  For one moment, just one second, i feel  immortal!!!

Diana Nyad



8 Comments leave one →
  1. January 6, 2009 11:40 pm

    A light bulb just came on. I have an idea. Have you done any stretching? Try to do some stretching in order for the muscles to move and to get the hip-joint moving! I don’t mean to be hippie and smoke a joint! I am not a Physical Therapist by any mean. If you happen to know any PT in your area, you might want to get an assessment.

  2. January 7, 2009 12:11 am

    Hang in there friend.
    I remember in the beginning of 2008 – my running was going well and I felt so good about myself and splat a injury to my knee. Then to make things worse I still ran on it for 3 more weeks which ultimately stopped my running for 6 weeks!!! I hated every minute of it, but afterwars I learned a great noob lesson. The good thing is it is cold/ winter isn’t even here yet and if it is time to heal this is the very best time. Noone likes running in freakin cold. Damn you have so many good oppurtunities running in NY that there will be many more. Always listen to your body!
    Listen to Teddie also..
    By the time Spring gets here you will be back kickin ass or at least in 2 weeks if you head the warning… 🙂
    I use to run sub 5 min/ miles BTW. How did I do that?? We are a gettin older . We can’t expect to do what we did when we were younger.

  3. January 7, 2009 3:57 pm

    I’m with Ted and Dave. Stretching can work wonders. Maybe you should try some yoga? And just listen to your body. If it says it needs some rest, then give it some rest. Then when it’s all good to go, you’ll forget that you even had an injury. But if you go out there too soon, you will be reminded of the injury in every step you take. So chill out and get your asana on.

  4. January 7, 2009 5:12 pm

    I was also going to say the same thing as Christie. Maybe yoga? They have those free Exercise On TV yoga sessions!

  5. January 8, 2009 12:28 am

    As we say in one of my running clubs, HTFU!

    Hope that helps.
    If it doesn’t, try the stretching thing. Get a foam roller and do the release exercises on it. (Hurts like hell, helps with HTFUing.)

  6. January 8, 2009 12:59 am

    see if a few Advil help too. I was able to survive an injury and race a few years back by pumping in the Advil. Up your fluid intake too to try to flush out the pain.

  7. January 8, 2009 7:56 pm

    I like that Coldplay song.

    Girlfriend, I think you need to get serious about stretching.

    I’ve leanred a lot in 2008, but top of my list is the importance of stretching. I’m now trying to equally balance stretching, stregth work, and running (biking/swimming). I feel soooooo much better. And I use the foam roller too.

    The hardest part was learning what stretches to do and getting into a rythm to do them regularly. I’m hoping my yoga attempt will help with this as well.

    What do you think? At least consider trying it?

    Heal up!!

  8. michjoy61 permalink*
    January 8, 2009 8:00 pm

    Hi you bet i will try it!! It’s funny i was speaking to my running friend just this morning and she was trying to explain to me some good stretches but i am such a dork i couldn’t really understand what she was telling me do to.

    Just know i was on my cell standing up and hopping up and down because she told me too!!!

    Oy Vey!!

    I didn’t run now for 4 days!!!

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